With characteristically impeccable timing, mirror-man Reflex has suffered a computer malfunction (doubtless at the hands of these pesky gremlins I've been hearing so much about) and his Site Update writing duties have accordingly been dumped on the new guy. I tried to remind my fellow Journalists that I'd been writing these things since before their overly clinical sex-ed teachers had even broached the subject of forge-gasms, but they wouldn't listen. On the other hand, it's been a good while since I've dipped my toes in the journalistic pool, and with my inaugural article being thrust on my unsuspecting typing-fingers with but a couple of hours notice until the deadline I'm sure to be a little rusty. So please, dear friends, bear with ol' Peg whilst he attempts to dust off the cobwebs and relive his youth at your expense. If I begin to ramble then please reign me in as soon as poss-... oh who am I kidding? Put up and shut up.
Back in, umm...red
After the veritable torrent of shifting colours that danced before your eyes in the last update, I'm afraid that this one is going to be comparatively meagre. However, I'm reliably informed that quality outstrips quantity, and with a duo like this your memories of last update will soon fade faster than a late 90s CD cover in a charity shop window that lacks suitable glare protection. That's right, folks. This was no mere April Fool's Day prank sprung from the devious mind of our anglian admin, and he has finally settled upon a suitable replacement for the recently departed Shad0w Viper, who's now left green with envy. Moderating juggernaut Transactionzero has ascended to the level of super saiyan tw- uhh, I mean Administrator (anyone who guesses which episode of DBZ I'm watching whilst writing this gets a cookie). Be sure to worship at his feet and beg pardon for your past misgivings, or face his wrath as your new lord and master. Oh, and some noob called Pegasi is going to be writing and junk from now on. Big whoop.
We also have some fresh blood for our coveted Loyal ranks to be duly acknowledged then immediately forgotten. It's none other than the ever-hardworking cart0graph, take a looksee down at the RH section below to see the latest fruits of his labour, then let him know how sexy you think his new threads are.
Ch- ch- ch- ch- changes
Back in my day we didn't have fancy images like that. We didn't use float tags for these overly "presentable" column layouts either. Hell, we didn't even have a TRC Guild, so you'll have to forgive me if I seem less than at home in the following sections. Nostalgic sentiments aside, we have business to attend to.
Newly promoted Review Hub Leader Organite has been working to reshuffle his ranks and address the issues with both submission processes and action within the Hub.
You should click on this here word to get the rundown on what'll be happening, but changes include a fully revamped procedure for requesting a review aimed at making submissions easier to sort through and deal with, as well as a system whereby maps that have passed through the Testers Guild before being submitted to the Review Hub will have priority over those that have not. This is to ensure that maps which have proven their basic functionality are given first dibs at getting a full review, whilst also giving the ugly sister of the TRC Guild some sense of purpose in their endless drudgery. Now, on to the reviews themselves:
Ocho 2 : 7.7/10 - cart0graph
Parapit : 7.9/10 - PacMonster1
Things which stay the same
Did I say ugly sister? I meant utter hawty. So fine, in fact, that our TG brethren are now no longer bound to hide behind mere blocks of text and appear in fully fledged video form (presented in Technicolor™). If you feel you have something to offer in the way of map testing services, with the ability to help out on the capturing and video production front being a noteworthy plus, or you just have a burning desire to see your name in purple for all to marvel at, then make your way over to the TG Subforum and begin your rise to glory
And by the way, the title which I assigned to this section was a barefaced lie. Yup, that's right, Pegasi can not and should not be trusted. The TG actually has a fresh batch of changes incoming as well, though for now they remain under wraps. Keep an eye out in the general vicinity of the TG Subforum for an upcoming announcement on the future of the Guild.
We also have a roundup video for the latest TG term hosted by Rho Fs, Skisma and Stevo:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpBATffdwtg
QOTSU
Is it just me that thinks of Queens of the Stone Age every time they look at this section? That's not this week's question by the way, don't think you're getting off that easy. First we have to deal with the last bit of mess that Reflex left me, in the form of last week's QOTSU, asking you all to reveal your innermost secret: .... your favourite soft drink! Much as it pains me (you really have no idea), I'mma have to go with the following for a winner:
RC COLA BITCHES.
nobody likes RC Cola. :C
I'm SO ALONNNEEE. NOBODY THERE TO HOLLLDDDD MEEEEEE.
Simply because, well, who drinks RC Cola in this day and age? You win this round, Sarge, but let it be known that it is purely on the basis of camp value. Now, for this week's question:
If you were in the [rather stylish] shoes of the esteemed Transactionzero, and found yourself promoted to Administrator, though only for the duration of April Fools day, what would you do with your limitless but short lived power?
Bubai
Well there we have it, my triumphant return to Journalistic glory undeniably stands as one of the most measly updates in history. However, you get what you pay for, and seeing as I'm currently out a couple of hours with nothing but these measly magic beans to show for it, you should consider yourselves lucky. But in all honesty it's good to be back, I've missed putting figurative pen to nonexistent paper and watching you all sit there, forced to read my ramblings as official doctrine. Our beloved Reflex should be back at the helm in two weeks (touch wood), but I'll be back on our front pages in due time in some other, as yet undetermined form. Until then, it's been a pleasure guys.
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